Sean was only 21 years old when he passed away, leaving behind a devastated mum, dad, big brother, and a family who loved him very much. He was born in August 2002 and growing up it became apparent that he wasn’t reaching the milestones children should be. He was later diagnosed with Autism.

 

Sean led a very happy life but faced many challenges along the way. He overcame them like a true warrior and I liked to call him after my favourite superhero: Superman. His strength matched no other. Menial tasks that we take for granted weren’t as easy for Sean but his parents and big brother were always on hand to help. Sean was nonverbal and the family developed their own language, communicating through hand gestures (and some words) to help them understand his needs. He was happiest at home with them.

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Sean attended school until he was 18 years old and on leaving it was hard for the family to create a new routine that would give him joy. They found it by visiting the local town centre where Sean would enjoy watching the doors open and close and watching people go by. Everyone got to know him and his ways. He would help in local shops, and even without speaking, he had a connection with them all.

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Sean and his mum were intertwined; a connection like no other. They did everything together, and he was happiest when he was at home with her. They were always together when going out. They would go on long walks and he loved watching the birds, especially the crows. He loved helping her with household tasks, watching the TV (and having it the loudest it could be!), and only allowing her to watch certain channels. She would do anything to bring him joy.

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Sean’s dad built a business so that he could give his family a good life, they were his priority. Sean loved it when his dad came home after work, getting him to do their routine no matter what kind of day his dad had at work. He did it for Sean, it was their time. At the weekend Sean would get so excited when he knew he and his parents were going for a drive in the car to “Big Purple” (their nickname for Tesco). This brought him great joy.

 

Sean had the best big brother and, just like his parents, he would do anything to make Sean happy. Even at a young age his big brother made sure of this. When Sean’s brother got his new dog, Sean wasn’t very enamoured with it, he just wanted his big brother’s attention and his big brother would make sure he got it.

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Sean was a special gift to our family. Throughout his life he taught us so much.

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• Love unconditionally, a pure and powerful kind of love

• Don’t judge people, let people be who they are as you do not know the challenges that person may face.

• Be kind with your words, words matter and can hurt.

• Patience, taking time to learn their new behaviour or skill.

• Happiness, learn that sometimes it’s the simpler things that can bring great joy.

 

Sean lost his final battle this year, a loss so great that I wish I had the words that could describe the pain at this time.

 

We will love and miss you forever. Till we meet again.

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AA McFadden

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